What happened to “Happily Ever After”?
If you’re married, you’ve probably experienced misunderstandings, felt hurt, and wondered, “Is this as good as it gets?”
It might not feel that serious. Just flat…boring…where did the sizzle go?
Or you might be so busy with kids, work, and activities that you haven’t noticed how your marriage is drifting.
You may even be saying things like, “This is too hard” or “This isn’t what I signed up for”.
Though you hate to admit it, you may have thoughts about ending your marriage.
You might have gone so far as to call a lawyer or search for an apartment. Or, you might spend hours in a fantasy world where everything is just the way you want it.
No one told you how much marriage might hurt. Somehow you missed “Happily Ever After”.
This is the time to make a change.
Time for a Pulse Check:
What am I checking for? The heartbeat of your relationship.
What happens when you water and fertilize a seed? It grows.
What happens when you ignore it and focus on other things?
Weeds take over.
It’s the same with your marriage.
Ask yourself: What is the state of our marriage garden today? What happens if nothing changes?
If you ignore physical pain signals, hoping they will go away, you put yourself at risk.
It’s the same with emotional pain.
Your pain is a signal for help. “Hey! Help me out here!” your inner self is crying.
Pretending it’s not there or hoping it will go away on its own only leads to loss.
Many get stuck in an either-or mentality.
Either “We stay here in misery together” or “I have to get out of here”. Have you had these thoughts?
I’m here to offer a third way.
What if you could have the marriage you really want? With the person you’re married to, I mean.
If you are like everyone I’ve ever met, you want to be heard, valued, and loved for who you are.
Not-so-secret secret: Your spouse wants the very same thing.
Before you call it quits, call me.
You might look around and think, “Everyone else is happy in their marriage. What’s wrong with us?”
Or, you might hear of another friend getting divorced and feel a weird mixture of “Oh no!” and “I knew it!” and—hard to admit to yourself—jealousy.
All of these are comparisons. It’s natural to compare yourselves with others to a point, and our culture does it all the time.
However, your marriage isn’t really about all those other people.
It’s about YOU. And the LOVE of your LIFE.
What works for someone else may not work for you. Let go of comparisons. They’re deadly.
Allow yourself to learn and be inspired by others. Embrace the path you’re on for yourself and your spouse.